The part of my body I’m most grateful for right now is…
My mind did not panick about exams. It took the pressure well.
My ears allow me to enjoy movies.
My body is the epitomy of sexiness.
My face is gracefully beautiful.
My stomach is handling the fasting well.
My vagina has freed me from infections.
My stomach has promised to remain flat forever lol.
In my mind, a “good life” looks like…
Laughter
Less emotional pain
Relationship happiness
I’m afraid of…because…
I fear that I’m partly a narcissist.
And that I may be narcissist to my children.
Yesterday I felt a lot of unconditional love from my brother. I was deeply moved. I want to open up to him about things that I am struggling with.
I wish I could be more honest with my partner about what I’m going through without feeling like I’m putting him in a box or limiting his freedom.
Its the middle of the semester and I dare not think of anything else than school. Right?
Wrong!
I am distracted by writing.
Or for a better word, engrossed by it.
It ignited that fire in me,
The opposite of an emotional wound
More like an emotional healing.
I just want to say that.
My mother does not throw tantrums at me.
Not any more.
No more reopening of healing wounds.
I just want to say that,
I am grateful for that.
I also feel: it is my effort to heal myself that is changing the environment around me.
I no longer feel that the universe is bringing back past pain into my life.
I am looking forward to life, to the exciting future now!
For support, I can turn to…
Definitely Samuel
Mr. Sampah
Aunty Dee
Mummy
Who can I be a support to?
Surprisingly anyone.
Daily Affirmation
I am happily and organised
I take time to rest and cleanse my body
I have a compatible partner.
My partner is financially sound.
I am financially sound
My partner is caring financially.
I dwell in abundance.
I have a supportive family
I have supportive brothers
I have a supportive and open father.
My life is wonderful
I have supportive course mates.
My capstone journey is defined and unscary.
My semester is glorious and I get the best grades ever in Ashesi.
I have three wonderful girlfriends who I can trust and rely upon.
Scattered Clouds, 24°C
What is truly worth focusing on today?
Today, it will be great to focus on fostering a more understanding relationship with my mother so that she trusts my decisions more.
It will also be great to focus on enjoying the simple things of the day, like good music on the radio, etc.
Another thing would be to focus on completing the form That Teni sent, to post my stuff on the Ford foundation website; so exciting! And maybe a little scary.
Guide me o, thou great Jehova
Pilgrim through this barren land
I am w***, but thou art mighty
Hold me with thy powerful hand.
Bread of heaven
Bread of heaven.
Feed me till I want no more
Bread of heaven
Bread of heaven
Feed me till I want no more.
Open up the crystal fountain
Where the healing stream shall flow
Where the fury roundly driver
Lead me all my journey through.
Strong deliverer
Strong deliverer
Be thou still my strength and shield
Strong deliverer
Strong deliverer
Lead me all my journey through.
I feel
As though I have hit my father’s glass plate
Hard on the ground
And I am hiding in shame and disgrace
Hoping never to be found by mother
Broken Clouds, 25°C
I’m Human
This piece is written with the help of an article written by Mark Manson, the author of the Subtle Art of not giving a fuck. It is also what i have learnt through experience and through self discovery.
..and then i feel that i dont know what to write, even though i have the inspiration. Lemme just put down what comes to mind for now.
I walk down the road with people coming towards my direction. I feel nervous, and i trip and almost fall. But then i hold myself from falling and i raise my head up high with pride. I’m not shitty because i almost hit the ground; i’m human.
I’m not ashamed of myself when i feel a burning sensation in my chest because a colleague does better than me; a feeling of jealousy. I observe myself, observe the moment. I understand the situation, understand why i feel this way. I forgive myself, knowing that the jealousy i I feel will fade away, as always.
I say i am against gender roles, i say it with all my heart, in all honesty, and i believe i will never go against my proclaim; and then i realise that i would ask a person what his father does to know the level of income of that family. How i have fooled myself! What of the mother? Doesn’t her income also count? Even better, can’t her income be higher? The most believable lie is the one that we dream is true; the one we tell ourselves to believe, i should have known.
Tip: Never try to know someone through an interview, the person is highly likely to have false beliefs about who they really are. Rather observe their actions; that’s who they really are.
I say i’m going to be self discipline and work out, and then i take a nap and never wake up. The next day i beat myself up. But I look ahead and say once again with even more confidence; ‘I will go jogging.’
There she is; the sharp knife.
Sitting as a queen, this sharp knife.
Giving my fingers a hungry grin, oh! this sharp knife.
Waiting to have them in her custody once more.
One taste of my blood is not enough,
She wants more of the juicy red goodness,And she won’t spare me, not even once.
As I dice the carrots, as I slice the onions,
As I cut the oranges…
She takes the opportunity to imprint her signature of bloody bruises,
Leaving behind her marks for my mama to behold.
She’s crude, and she shows me no mercy.
She would chop my fingers off if she had the chance, I can almost hear her say.
I’m frustrated, but I’m not left in despair,
Because I know that time will not only heal my bloody fingers:
Gradually but surely, time will take away her sharpness,
And she will mellow back into the shelves, too embarrassed to come out .
I cannot wait, I cannot wait,
Till the sharp knife becomes blunt and loses her pride.
The end.
Thanks for joining me!
Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton
